Learn Your WANT skills

microphoneSinging is Not One of My Want Skills

I have always WANTED to be a singer.  But anyone who knows me knows that I am not a very good singer.  But that doesn’t mean the “want” isn’t still there.

This whole want to sing started when I was 12 and heard Madonna for the first time.  I learned quickly from my peers, from my brother, and every boyfriend I ever had, that I should shut up and do something else.  Singing was not something I could do well no matter how much I WANTED to do it.

Fast forward to 2010.  I’m on holiday with my new barely one year old, in the USA, visiting my family for the summer.  I was deep in my depression and had to find ANYTHING to do, to keep busy with this child or else I knew I would fall off the rails.  So I signed up for a Music Together class.  It’s one of those classes where you and your baby go and sing songs, do little dances and movements to the music.  It was HERE, that I was given license to sing – hooray!  Not only did I still enjoy singing but as I listened to the other Mums and realised I wasn’t all that bad and if anything, I could hold a tune, even if I was a bit tone deaf.

What Are Want Skills?

I chatted with the Music Together teacher who explained that anyone could sing, if they WANTED TO, you just have to acquire the skills to do it.  What are those skills?

Skills such as learning to read music, learn and practice note scales, and then doing these exercises daily.  These were skills that I just didn’t enjoy doing.  At the end of the day, I didn’t “want” to learn to become a singer, I just wanted to sing.  That’s a huge difference.  And so, I am still that tone-deaf singer who belts it out like Madonna in the car, in the shower, and in the kitchen…. and I’m happy with that!  (Want satisfied!)

If you really WANT to do something, you have to WANT to do and learn the skills required to achieve your goal.  If you want to hike Mt. Everest, you have to want to learn the skills required and put in the time to prepare for that hike.  If you want to lose weight, you have to WANT to learn how to jog properly, use the machines at a gym, or learn how to eat nutritiously.  If you want to find a partner in life, you have to WANT to share pieces of yourself with others to make a connection.  To achieve the things you want, you have to DO SOMETHING and that requires learning and utilizing your skills.

Finding Your Want Skills

Want skills are skills only you posses. They are the skills you enjoy, like, want to do, and naturally do to get what you want.

Here are some questions to identify your want skills.

What skills have you been “trained” to do?  

List them and then knock off the ones that you don’t enjoy.  Here’s my list:  Event Planning, Writing, Marketing, Editing, Event Set Up, Website Development, Content Creation, Speaking, Spreadsheet and Financial Management, Research, Management.

What skills do you posses at parties? 

Are you the caterer?  Are you the comedian?  Are you the connector?  Are you the gossiper?  Are you the networker?  Are you the observer?  Are you the drinker?  Are you the entertainer?  Are you the photographer?  Are you the disk jockey?  Are you the dancer?  Are you the host?  Are you the guest?  Either list these in order or choose those skills you really enjoy doing – because they become your want skills.

When you’re around kids, what do you like to do?  

Do you like to draw?  Do you like to watch movies?  Do you like to jump on the trampoline?  Do you like to ride a bike?  Do you like to do Lego’s?  Do you like to cook?  Do you like to play with dollhouses or play sets?  Do you like to do puzzles?  Do you like to do arts and crafts?  Do you like to paint?  Do you like to…. Kids know authenticity when they see it, so when you’re doing something with kids, make note of the skills you’re practicing while getting lost in the moment.  

Finally, the famous question: if you were given a day off, what would you do? 

Would you read a book?  Go for a run?  Would you eat in a restaurant?  Would you work in the garden?  Would you cruise the Internet?  Paint or do art?  Would you travel – on a bus, a train, into a city, to the countryside, to a historic building, to a landmark?  Would you sleep?  Would you meet up with new people?  What would you do?  Make a list and then look at all the skills you’d be practicing DURING THAT TIME you’re doing.  Those are want skills.

Learn Your WANT skills
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